This is not a drill! This is the real deal; the day we’ve all been waiting for: when our bulk buying, stockpiling, and preparedness pays off (cues distant sounds of battlefield explosions and gunfire). Moms, this is our time to shine!
Ok ok in all seriousness, feminine energy naturally rises up times of crisis like this. We’re nurturers so we feel an innate calling to shift into self-sacrificing response mode. Many of us are already SAHM or WFHM while others are in jobs that have given us the option to work from home until this health scare is resolved. Whatever the case, we’re finding ourselves on intense mom-duty for the unforeseeable future. Home with the kids all day, cooking, cleaning, refereeing , facilitating learning activities; it’s tiring just thinking about it. So we’ll have to tap into our inner goddess to get through. Martyring, as we so love to do, during this already tough time will only ensure our slow and untimely demise.
Need I also remind you that you’re not earning extra points for how much you neglect yourself? Being a mom is often a thankless job so trust me – no one is keeping your sacfrafice score but you. It’s an ugly truth. But the moment we get honest about this, the quicker we can get back to showing ourselves appreciation. Someday they’ll beam about how awesome we are, but today, we’re taking tiny steps toward our own self-love.
- Get dressed. I know many of us don’t have anywhere to go, but jeans and a decent top (or go big and actually put on earrings and mascara) will keep you from feeling like the housekeeper. Wearing pajamas or lounge wear all day signals to the brain that you can be casual because you aren’t doing anything important. And we know that’s not true. Dress for the level of value you want to feel.
- Make personal development easy. Checkout an audiobook from the local library and use earphones while the kids nap or have their own tv time. Leave your journal next to the breast pump so you remember to write. Whatever the activity is, find the most confident way to indulge.
- DIY your favorite beauty treatment. Carve out time (by reminding dad that he can manage the kids alone for one hour of an entire day) for a face mask, manicure, or deep conditioning. Sacrificing your time AND appearance will only make you feel more resentful every time you look in the mirror.
- Squeeze in a short ritual wherever you can. Bathroom time in the morning, light your favorite candle, then make coffee – anything works. Aim to create a sequence of 3 things you can stick to that will help you feel like you have some sort of grasp on your personal time/space. Don’t skip any steps in your ritual, we’re not sacrificing this. Plus, most times that “urgent” thing can wait another few minutes. There’s food on the floor? Welp – it’s already down there so you might as well have some coffee before you clean. We all know that once you grab the broom, it’ll be another 20 minutes before you get back around to pouring yourself a cup.
- Stay up just 10 more minutes. No, not to clean the kitchen. Use the 10 extra minutes to put a bow on your day. Read a passage from your Bible, meditate, do some bedside yoga, have some warm tea…and the vitamin you forgot to take this morning. Find some way to end your day knowing that you took one final opportunity to love on your mental, emotional, physical, or spiritual self.
(Kidding, just don’t let your kids or spouse read the rest)
Bonus tip #1: Don’t be afraid to be the “mean” mom. You’re going to be mean anyway but be mean in the name of structure. Request that no one interrupt while you’re on the patio, in your bedroom, or hell – in the bathroom. Find one spot in the house that immediately becomes known as the “don’t bother mom” zone. Pretty this space up with sights and scents that spark joy. Remember, you’re a whole human. You were you before anyone else came along and there’s nothing wrong with taking care of her.
Bonus tip #2: Hide your damn snacks. Who the hell said being a good mom meant sharing every single thing you own?! You bought the Oreos, they’re yours.
You’ve got this, mom. Magic comes naturally to you – just don’t forget to save a little bit for yourself.